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[C] Anime

Cartes blanches

". . . ."
"Bang."
"INUYASHA!!"
"KAGOME!!"
"WE UNDERSTAND ANIME FAN WANTS!!"
#DesuDes4Life.
CHIIIIIIIIN.
$300 anime bluray boxsets.
1,000 years of pain.
4Kids.
A "read the manga" style ending.
A 30-year-old man who's obsessed with K-on!
A bass guitar straight to the face.
A big-breasted 14-year-old wearing a bikini and sucking on a popsicle.
A Bleach hentai doujin where Rukia rapes Ichigo.
A brand new, mint condition copy of JoJo's Bizarre Adventure vol. 4, still in shrinkwrap.
A busty, blonde, blue-eyed, dumb-as-rocks American.
A Captain Harlock body pillow.
A Claymore swimsuit issue.
A copy of Trigun signed by Micah Solusod.
A dead meme.
A dolphin in a mech suit.
A drunken Japanese businessman.
A fat middle-aged man in a Sailor Moon costume.
A fuck-mothering vampire.
A Hello Kitty! vibrator.
A Henry Goto joke that no one will laugh at other than SpacemanHardy.
A Japanese schoolgirl covered head-to-toe in semen.
A large paper fan.
A leopard print fundoshi.
A Maka Chop.
A mindfuck.
A puppy being beaten to death with a flower pot.
A samurai terminator.
A shitload of yen.
A succubus living inside your testes.
A talking motorcycle.
Acidic breast milk.
ALL OF THE HOMO!
An argument lasting over an hour about what moé really is.
An arm and a leg.
An overly defensive fanbase.
Anime News Network.
Aniplex of America.
Apocalypse Zero.
ARMS.
Asian cock.
Ass dance!! Ass dance!!
Awesome Prussia.
Aya Hirano being gang-banged by her entire band.
Bad K-on! fanart.
Badass 15-year-olds.
Banana sushi.
Banging 1,000 dudes.
Bear punching, tiger chopping, shark suplexing, & helicopter bodyslamming.
Beautiful bishonen boys.
Being accidentally turned into a girl by aliens.
Being beaten to a bloody pulp by a middle school student.
Being eaten by a titan.
Being the uke.
Bible Black.
Birdy the Mighty.
Black cosplayers.
Black★Star
Black?Star
Bludgeoning Haruhi Suzumiya to death with a tire iron.
Blue Water Studios.
Boku no Pico.
Breast envy.
Brina Palencia as an angsty teenage boy, Monica Rial as his bratty little sister, and Shelley Calene-Black as their hot mom.
Broken-ass Aizen.
Bukkake.
Bulma's panties.
Butt sniffing.
Calling out the name of your attack.
Captain Bravo.
CARD GAMES ON MOTORCYCLES.
Carl Macek.
Cartoon buttholes.
Casca's hairy unshaven vag.
Catholic priests who drink, smoke, and carry guns.
CENTURY SOOOOUUUP!!!!!
Christopher R. Sabat.
Combat afros.
Cousin marriage.
Cowboy Bebop.
Creamy Mami.
Crispin Freeman.
Crystal Boy's creepy smile.
Cutting off a finger to restore your honor.
DAN GREEN.
Dancin' on the Planet Dance.
Darrel Guilbeau trying to act.
Dead catgirls.
Dio Brando.
Dr. Who fans showing up at anime cons despite not being invited.
Dragon Balls.
Drills for hands.
Eating a banana all sexy-like.
Eating an entire box of Pocky in a single bite.
Eating ramen noodles for a month because you HAD to have that out of print Macross boxset.
Eating someone else's drool.
Eating the wrong end of a chocolate cornet.
Edward Wong Hau Pepelu Tivruski IV.
El Psy Congroo.
Engrish.
Fake Nendoroids.
FANSERVICE!!!
Farting on your cat.
Farting... tadpoles?
Fat, sweaty otaku.
Finger nigiri.
Fishcake.
Flying Nimbus.
Flying Vortex of Fear.
Forcing someone to watch every episode of Dragon Ball GT.
Franky's awesome Speedo dance.
Freddie riding to school on a wild black stallion.
Fuckin' Bronies.
Fucking a nun.
Fujiko's boobs.
Fullmetal Alchemist.
FUNimation.
Futanari.
Gackt.
Gangnam Style.
Ganguro girls.
Gantz. Just.... Gantz.
Garzey's Wing.
Gen Fukunaga counting his money.
Gender-swapped Oda Nobunaga.
Getting drunk on sake.
Getting in a fistfight with an earthquake.
Getting kicked in the nuts by a mermaid.
Getting the bad ending of a visual novel.
Getting your fingernails ripped out.
Getting your penis cut in half.
Ghosts that come out of your asscrack.
Giant mutant cockroaches.
Giant naked Rei.
Giant robots.
Gilgamesh.
Girls with glasses.
Girls with guns.
Giving a girl an orgasm using only your shoulderpads.
Go Nagai sideburns.
Goku, Luffy, Toriko, and Lina Inverse in an eating contest.
Goku.
GONZO.
Good ol' fashioned Japanese sexism.
Governor Ishihara.
Gratuitous panty shots.
Grave of the Fireflies.
Griffith's mysterious disappearing penis.
Groping strangers on a train.
Guro.
Guts.
Hatsune Miku.
Having blackmail sex with your teacher.
Heavily-tattooed yakuza henchmen.
Henry Goto being eaten by a group of backwoods hillbilly cannibals.
Henry Goto being savagely raped by a bear.
Henry Goto bleeding profusely from his groin after having his penis bitten off by a 15-year-old Vietnamese prostitute.
Henry Goto ending up homeless on the streets and sucking dick for coke.
Henry Goto falling down the stairs, receiving a massive head injury, and believing he's really Sailor Moon.
Henry Goto fapping to a photograph of himself.
Henry Goto having an accident in his pants during the live Aniplex of America panel.
Henry Goto, John Sirabella, and Stu Levy in a three man fight to the death.
Henry Goto.
Henry Goto's massive peyote & wine cooler addiction.
Hetalia porn.
Highschool of the Dead.
Hokuto! Hyakurestu-ken!
Holy dildos.
Home For Infinite Losers (HFIL).
Host clubs.
Hot female bass players.
Hot-blooded shonen protagonists.
Hunting down every single copy of Ninja Resurrection and setting them on fire.
I AM AWESOME!!
I'LL ANSWER THE PHONE FROM NOW ON, LILY!!
Ice cold water
(and it's only a dollar).
Idiots who don't seem to realize that Avatar: The Last Airbender isn't really an anime.
Ikki Tousen.
Inspector Zenigata.
Jacuzzi Splot.
Japanese rope bondage.
Japanese Spider-Man.
JesuOtaku's ginormous lips.
Johannes Krauser II.
Johnny Yong Bosch.
Juvijuvibro.
Kamen Rider.
Keith David's voice.
Kenshiro.
Kigurumi.
KING!!! KING!!! KING GAINER!!!
*does the Monkey*
Kira worshippers.
Kirino's ass.
KITTEH. :3
Kotetsu T. Kaburagi, aka. "The D.I.L.F."
Kyubey.
Ladd Russo.
LAZAR!
Lesbian subtext.
Let's Fighting Love!
Little Kuriboh.
Lolis.
Losing 20 gallons of blood... and surviving.
Love Machine.
M.D. Geist.
Mad Bull 34.
Madhouse.
Magical girls.
Maid cafes.
Making someone's head explode.
Mami getting her head bitten off.
Mamoru Miyano.
Man-Faye.
Manly tears of manliness.
Masa! <3
Masturbating over Asuka's comatose body.
MAWNING LESCUE!!!
Me wearing a penguin suit.
Mewtwo.
Michelle Ru-
er, I mean... "Sophie Roberts."
Moe Moe Kyun!
Monkey D. Luffy.
Mr. Tadakichi.
Multi-episode fights.
MUNGLE!!
*shakes fist*
Muscle-bound shirtless MEN.
My badass numchucks.
My Cresta.
My hot zombie girlfriend..
My Johnny!
Naga's extremely annoying laugh.
Naoki Urasawa.
Narutards.
Naruto.
Naughty geishas.
Nekomimi.
Nerdy kids in Speedos.
Nice boat.
Ninjas!
Norio Wakamoto.
Octopus balls.
Old man dragon dick.
One HELL of a butler.
Onii-chan.
Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora! Ora!
Origami sex toys.
Oro?
Osamu Tezuka.
OVER 9000!!
Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt.
PASTAAAAA!!!!
Petite Princess Yucie.
Physics.
Plot armor.
Princess Tutu.
Production I.G.
Prof's legs.
Prying SpacemanHardy's Master Keaton boxset from his cold, dead hands.
Pubic hair needle attack.
Puella Magi Madoka Magica.
Punching a man so hard his clothes fly off.
Puppets made from the skin of children.
Pure fighting spirit.
Pure grade-A opium.
Putting all the condiments on your steak. ALL OF THEM.
R-R-R-R-R-REDLINE!!!
Raccoon testicles.
Rally Vincent firing a gun in her underwear.
Rape fantasies.
Raping Tokyo Tower.
Rapping samurai.
Really shitty CGI effects.
Recap episodes.
Red bean paste.
Red-headed tsunderes.
Reverse harems.
Revy Two-Hands.
Rice balls.
Rie Kugimiya.
Robots with tits.
Romi Paku.
Rule 63'd Death the Kid.
Running during the credits.
Saber Starblast.
Sailor Moon and the 7 Ballz.
Sarah Fuckin' Palin.
Satan worshipping Christians.
Satoshi Kon.
School swimsuits.
Scott McNeil.
Sexy jutsu.
Sexy schoolteacher types.
Shinichiro Watanabe single-handedly curing cancer, ending world hunger, and bringing peace to the Middle East.
Shining Finger!
Shinji being a whiny little bitch.
Shooting out nearly an entire liter of cum.
Showing episodes of Toriko to starving children.
Showing Serial Experiments Lain to toddlers.
Shrine maidens.
Sir Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing.
Snapping the nipple off of a prostitute's breast and eating it.
Sneaking a peek at the girls' open bath.
Soldier A.
Sonny Strait's manly parts.
Soul traveling.
Standing outside the gates of the White House completely naked with a revolver in your hand.
Steve Motherfuckin' Blum.
Sticking a chopstick in your pee-hole.
Sticking your finger up her ass.
Strangling hardcore otaku nerds with razor wire.
Strapping hand grenades to your pubes.
Strikeman and his "Balls of Justice".
Studio Ghibli.
Stupid fucking Kululu.
Stupid sexy Johan.
Sub-only releases.
Sucking Kyle Hebert's dick for hamburgers.
Super Milk-chan.
Suplexing your teacher.
Swallowing an entire carton of cigarettes before barfing them back up.
Tachikoma-kun.
Taking a potato chip... and EATING IT.
Taking a shit in the shrine's donation box.
Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann.
Tentacle rape.
TETSUOOOOOO!!!
That little fat kid from Accel World.
That one guy who always dresses up as the Red Ranger.
That sound effect in every hentai when the guy ejaculates.
That stupid opening song from Steel Angel Kurumi getting stuck in your head.
The alpha bitch.
The Animatrix.
The Death Note.
The entire cast of School Days.
The entire last episode of Blood-C.
The eternal pervert, Eric Vale.
The Garden of Sinners.
The GARtender.
The goddamn Maho.
The Gripper.
The Hare Hare Yukai dance.
The hot buttered sex voice of Patrick Seitz.
The inevitable beach episode.
The inkvasion.
The Irresponsible Captain Tylor.
The life-sized Gundam statue.
The Major's hips and bust.
THE MAN-POLE OF DOOOOOOOOOM!!!
The One Piece rap.
The power of friendship.
The Shikon Jewel.
The thousands upon thousands of women that Golgo 13 has slept with.
The Tsukihime anime.
The ungodly abomination that is Robotech.
Thinking Misty from Pokémon is... kinda sexy.
Third Impact.
Tig ol' bitties.
Tits on your hand.
Toilet worship.
Trying to get your die-cast Gundam model through airport security.
Twincest.
Two gallons of elephant shit being dropped on Henry Goto's desk.
Uguu...
Undead body-swapping space vampire teens.
Underpants. Underpants. Underpants. Underpants. Under-
Underwater Ray Romano.
Unreasonably long transformation sequences.
Used panty vending machines.
Vash the Stampede.
Vegeta's sweet goatee.
Vic Micderpaderp.
Walpurgisnacht.
Watching FLCL while tripping on acid.
WcDonald's.
Wearing panties on the head.
Weeaboos.
Wendee Lee.
Whatever the hell the Utena movie was about.
Whatever turns you on, big guy.
Wibble.
Yet another goddamn Goku vs. Superman argument.
You cactus bastard!
You dumbass!
Your virgin soul.
Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series.
ZA WARUDO.
Zetman.

Cartes noires

____ vs. ____. BEST. FIGHT. EVER.
____. BELIEVE IT!
____. Goddammit, Japan.
____. HE DEDD.
____. Only on Toonami
____. So kawaii!! <3 <3
____. That is the kind of man I was.
____. YOU SHOULD BE WATCHING.
After a long, arduous battle, ____ finally met their end by ____.
After years of searching, the crew of the Thousand Sunny finally found out that the One Piece is actually ____.
Animation studio ____ is perhaps best known for ____.
Behold the name of my Zanpakuto, ____!
By far the best panel at any anime convention is the one for ____.
Cards Against Anime: It's more fun than ____!
Chicks. Dig. ____. Nice.
Coming to Neon Alley: ____, completely UNCUT & UNCENSORED.
Congratulations, ____.
Cooking is so fun! Cooking is so fun! Now it's time to take a break and see what we have done! ____. YAY! IT'S READY!!
Digimon! Digivolve to: ____-mon!
Don't worry, he's okay! He survived thanks to ____.
Dr. Black Jack, please hurry! The patient is suffering from a terminal case of ____!
Dreaming! Don't give it up ____! Dreaming! Don't give it up ____! Dreaming! Don't give it up ____!
Every now and then, I like to participate in the time-honored Japanese tradition of ____.
Fresh from Japan: The new smash hit single by ____ titled ____.
From the creators of Tiger & Bunny: ____ & ____!!
From the twisted mind of Nabeshin: An anime about ____, ____, and ____.
Hayao Miyazaki's latest family film is about a young boy befriending ____.
He might just save the universe, if he only had some ____!
How did I avoid your attack? Simple. By ____.
I am in despair! ____ has left me in despair!
I have never in my life laughed harder than the first time I watched ____.
I know of opinions and all that, but I just don't understand how anyone could actually enjoy ____.
I want to be the very best, like no one ever was! ____ is my real test, ____ is my cause!
I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to accidentally walk in on you while you were ____!
I'M-A FIRIN' MAH ____!
If I was a magical girl, my cute mascot sidekick would be ____.
If you ask me, there need to be more shows about ____.
In the future of 199X, the barrier between our world and the demon world is broken, and thousands of monsters invade our realm to feed upon ____.
In the latest chapter of Golgo 13, he kills his target with ____.
In the latest chapter of Toriko, our hero hunts down, kills, and eats a creature made entirely of ____.
In the latest episode of Case Closed, Conan deduces that it was ____ who killed ____ because of ____.
In the name of the moon, I will punish ____!
In this episode of Master Keaton, Keaton builds ____ out of ____ and ____.
In truth, the EVA units are actually powered by the souls of ____.
Just announced: The brand new anime adaptation of ____, starring ____ as the voice of ____.
Karaoke night! I'm totally gonna sing my favorite song, ____.
Lupin the III's latest caper involves him trying to steal ____.
Make a contract with me, and become ____!
Make a love triangle.
Make a yaoi shipping.
Mamoru Oshii's latest film is a slow-paced, two hour-long cerebral piece about the horrors of ____.
Mom, I swear! Despite its name, ____ is NOT a porno!
My ____ is the ____ that will pierce the heavens!! *same white card used for both blanks*
My favorite episode of ____ is the one with ____.
My favorite hentai is the one where ____ is held down and violated by ____.
New from Studio GAINAX: ____ the Animation.
No matter how many times I see it, ____ always brings a tear to my eye.
No matter how you look at it, ultimately ____ is responsible for ____.
Nothing ruins a good anime faster than ____.
Now! Face my ultimate attack!
Of my entire collection, my most prized possession is ____.
Okay, I'll admit it. I would totally go gay for ____.
On the mean streets of Tokyo, everyone knows that ____ is the leader of the ________ Gang.
On the next episode of Dragon Ball Z, ____ is forced to do the fusion dance with ____.
On the next episode of Dragon Ball Z, Goku has a fierce battle with ____.
One thing you almost never see in anime is ____.
People die when they are ____.
Real men watch ____.
S-Shut up!! I-It's not like I'm ____ or anything.
Sasuke has ____ implants.
She'll thaw out if you try ____.
So just who is this Henry Goto fellow, anyway?
So wait, ____ was actually ____? Wow, I didn't see that one coming!
So, what have you learned from all of this?
Someday when I have kids, I want to share with them the joys of ____.
Take this! My love, my anger, and all of my ____!
The best English dub I've ever heard is the one for ____.
The best part of my ____ costume is ____.
The English dub of ____ sucks worse than ____.
The government of Japan recently passed a law that effectively forbids all forms of ____.
The inspiration behind the latest hit show is ____.
The most annoying kind of anime fans are ____.
The most overused anime cliche is ____.
The new Gurren Lagann blurays from Aniplex will literally cost you ____.
The new manga from ____ is about a highschool girl discovering ____.
The next big Tokusatsu show: "Super Sentai ____ Ranger!"
The rarest Pokémon in my collection is ____.
The show was great, until ____ showed up.
The World Line was changed when I sent a D-mail to myself about ____.
There are guilty pleasures. And then there's ____.
THIS ____ HAS BEEN PASSED DOWN THE ARMSTRONG FAMILY LINE FOR GENERATIONS!!!
This ____ of mine glows with an awesome power! Its ____ tells me to defeat you!
This doujinshi I just bought has ____ and ____ getting it on, hardcore.
This is our final battle. Mark my words, I will defeat you, ____!
This morning, hundreds of Japanese otaku lined up outside their favorite store to buy the limited collector's edition of ____.
This year, I totally lucked out and found ____ in the dealer's room.
This year, I'm totally gonna cosplay as ____.
To save the world, you must collect all 7 ____.
Truly and without question, ____ is the manliest of all men.
Using my power of Geass, I command you to do... THIS!
Vegeta, what does the scouter say?
WANTED: $50,000,000,000 reward for the apprehension of____.
Watch it! Or I'll take your ____.
Welcome home, Master! Is there anything your servant girl can bring you today?
What do I hate most about anime?
What do I love most about anime?
What is moé?
When Henry Goto is alone and thinks that no one's looking, he secretly enjoys ____.
When I found all 7 Dragon Balls, Shenron granted me my wish for ____.
When it comes to hentai, nothing gets me hotter than ____.
When it comes to Japanese cuisine, there's simply nothing better than ____.
Whenever I'm splashed with cold water, I turn into ____.
While writing Dragon Ball, Akira Toriyama would occasionally take a break from working to enjoy ____.
Who are you callin' ____ so short he can't see over his own ____?!?!
Who placed first in the most recent Shonen Jump popularity poll?
Who the hell do you think I am?!
Yo-Ho-Ho! He took a bite of ____.
Yoko Kanno's latest musical score features a song sung entirely by ____.
You are already ____.
You guys are so wrong. Obviously, ____ is best waifu.
You see, I'm simply ____.
You used ____. It's super effective!

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